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panda walks into a bar? A panda walked into a bar. He went up to the bar and said "I'd like a steak and kidney pie and a Coke please" so the barman took his order and the panda went to sit down. Soon a waiter brought over his meal. The panda ate it up, thanked and tipped the waiter and paid the bill. All this seemed pretty normal until the panda pulled out a gun from the depths of his fur, pulled the trigger and BANG! shot the waiter. The barman came over and said "Wha.. wh.. You just shot my friend!!!" the panda calmly replied "Do you know what I am?" "Why yes," the barman answered. "Your a panda." "Good," the panda nodded "Now go home and look up 'panda' in the dictionary." And with that, the panda walked out of the bar.The barman was a little unsure, however he was very eager to be enlighted on the subject of his friend's murder, so he went home to find his dictionary.After a while, he found 'panda' and quickly read the definition:PANDA:1. A black and white bear native to China. Eats shoots and leaves

panda in bar? panda walked into a bar. He went up to the bar and said "I'd like a steak and kidney pie and a Coke please" so the barman took his order and the panda went to sit down. Soon a waiter brought over his meal. The panda ate it up, thanked and tipped the waiter and paid the bill. All this seemed pretty normal until the panda pulled out a gun from the depths of his fur, pulled the trigger and BANG! shot the waiter. The barman came over and said "Wha.. wh.. You just shot my friend!!!" the panda calmly replied "Do you know what I am?" "Why yes," the barman answered. "Your a panda." "Good," the panda nodded "Now go home and look up 'panda' in the dictionary." And with that, the panda walked out of the bar. The barman was a little unsure, however he was very eager to be enlighted on the subject of his friend's murder, so he went home to find his dictionary. After a while, he found 'panda' and quickly read the definition: PANDA: 1. A black and white bear native to China. Eats shoots and leaves.

a panda in a bar!!!? A panda walked into a bar. He went up to the bar and said "I'd like a steak and kidney pie and a Coke please" so the barman took his order and the panda went to sit down. Soon a waiter brought over his meal. The panda ate it up, thanked and tipped the waiter and paid the bill. All this seemed pretty normal until the panda pulled out a gun from the depths of his fur, pulled the trigger and BANG! shot the waiter. The barman came over and said "Wha.. wh.. You just shot my friend!!!" the panda calmly replied "Do you know what I am?" "Why yes," the barman answered. "Your a panda." "Good," the panda nodded "Now go home and look up 'panda' in the dictionary." And with that, the panda walked out of the bar. The barman was a little unsure, however he was very eager to be enlighted on the subject of his friend's murder, so he went home to find his dictionary. After a while, he found 'panda' and quickly read the definition: PANDA:1. A black and white bear native to China. Eats shoots and leaves.

Panda bear xxx funny or not xxx? A panda bear walks into a bar, and tells the bartender that he wants to have lunch. The bartender gives him a menu and he orders. The panda bear eats his lunch, and when he finishes, he gets up to leave. Suddenly, the panda bear pulls an AK-47 out of his fur, and shoots the bar to pieces. He then heads for the door. The shocked bartender jumps out from behind the destroyed bar and yells, "Hey, what do you think you're doing? You ate lunch, shot up my bar, and now you're just going to leave?" The panda bear answers calmlly, "I'm a panda bear." The bartender says, "Yeah, so?" The panda bear replies, "Look it up," and walks out the door. The bartender jumps back behind the ruined bar and grabs his encyclopedia. He looks up "panda bear," and sure enough, there is a picture of the panda bear. He reads the caption, which says, "Panda Bear--a cuddly, black and white creature. Eats shoots and leaves."

Panda joke.? A panda bear walks into a bar, and tells the bartender that he wants to have lunch. The bartender gives him a menu and he orders. The panda bear eats his lunch, and when he finishes, he gets up to leave. Suddenly, the panda bear pulls an AK-47 out of his fur, and shoots the bar to pieces. He then heads for the door. The shocked bartender jumps out from behind the destroyed bar and yells, "Hey, what do you think you're doing? You ate lunch, shot up my bar, and now you're just going to leave?" The panda bear answers calmlly, "I'm a panda bear." The bartender says, "Yeah, so?" The panda bear replies, "Look it up," and walks out the door. The bartender jumps back behind the ruined bar and grabs his encyclopedia. He looks up "panda bear," and sure enough, there is a picture of the panda bear. He reads the caption, which says, "Panda Bear--a cuddly, black and white creature. Eats shoots and leaves." Cyber idol - its an alaskan malamute..i adore them theyre so beautiful.

panda bear joke? It's about 2 o'clock ,and you know how things look in a bar about two o'clock.. well there's a panda bear and a prostitute sitting together, and the woman asks if he would like to go home with her.. the panda bear looks her over and says sure.. so they go to her place they have a good time and the panda bear gets up to leave, when the prostitute yells ,"where do you think you're going?" the panda bear answers that he is going home, the woman then explains that she is a prostitute and the panda bear answers that he knows but he is a panda bear.. they can't see eye to eye on it so they decide to look it up on google ... they look up prostitute: a woman that gets paid for sexual favors, the panda bear answers that yes he knew that, now look up panda bear: a black and white bear that eats bushes and leaves.

panda bear and the prostitute>?>>>??? It's about 2 o'clock ,and you know how things look in a bar about two o'clock.. well there's a panda bear and a prostitute sitting together, and the woman asks if he would like to go home with her.. the panda bear looks her over and says sure.. so they go to her place they have a good time and the panda bear gets up to leave, when the prostitute yells ,"where do you think you're going?" the panda bear answers that he is going home, the woman then explains that she is a prostitute and the panda bear answers that he knows but he is a panda bear.. they can't see eye to eye on it so they decide to look it up in WEBSTER's ... they look up prostitute: a woman that gets paid for sexual favors, the panda bear answers that yes he knew that, now look up panda bear: a black and white bear that eats bushes and leaves.

This panda went to soho looking for a shag? he was in a bar when a girl asked him if she could do anything for him, the panda says ye could he go home with her, so they got back to her place and he asks for a ham toasty, then he made love to her, just then he said thanks im off, the girl looked suprised and said what about the payment, what you mean said the panda, im a prostatute she said, whats a prostatute says the panda, the lady of the knight give the panda a dictinary and said look it up the panda reads out sexual activities for money, aw says panda giving the prosy the dictinory read the meaning of panda, she reads out "Panda eats, shoots and leaves"

A Panda...well he's just acting like those Panda's do!!? A panda bear walks into a bar and orders a sandwich. The waiter brings him the sandwich. The panda bear eats it, pulls out a pistol, kills the waiter, and gets up and starts to walk out. The bartender yells for him to stop. The panda bear asks, "What do you want?" The bartender replies, "First you come in here, order food, kill my waiter, then try to go without paying for your food." The panda bear turns around and says, "Hey! I'm a Panda. Look it up!" The bartender goes into the back room and looks up panda bear in the encyclopedia, which read: "Panda: a bear-like marsupial originating in Asian regions. Known largely for it's stark black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."

A Panda walks into a restaurant? A panda walks into a restaurant. He sits down and orders some food. The waiter brings the panda his meal. After he eats, when the waiter brings him the check, the panda takes out a gun and shoots him. As the panda is leaving, the owner of the restaurant asks him, "Why did you shoot my waiter?" The panda replies, "I'm a panda. Look it up in the dictionary," and walks out. The owner, now very confused, looks panda up in his dictionary. "Panda: A marsupial that lives in the mountains of China, eats shoots and leaves."

What are Giant panda's? What is the scientific name of the panda? What is the panda's classification in the animal kingdom? What is the panda's status? What is a descreption of the animal? How does it look and feel like? What is the estimate of the panda's population? What is the panda's life span? How much space does it need? What is the panda's habitat? What is it's food? What is it's behavior? What is it's offspring? Is it protected? Is it a predator? What does it prey on? What preys on it? Where is it found? Is it a vertebrate ot an invertebrate? What type of symmetry does it have? Is it a a herbivore, carnivore, omnivore, or insectivore? What is the panda's adaptation for escaping preditors? and three other interesting facts? please give sources. If u want to send it to me in an email at sabrinaelkarmouty@yahoo.com

Panda Joke!!!? A panda runs into a bar goes and eats the bar nuts pulls out a gun fires thre shots into the air and is starting to leave, but then the bartender says what the hell was that all about. The panda throws the bartender s badly puncuated dictionary and he flips through the dictionary till he gets to panda. He gets to Panda and it reads as follows. PANDA: Eats shoots and leaves If it is good give me a thumbs up

Panda walks into a bar..................? A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for the food." The panda yells back, "Hey, man, I'm a panda. Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary to panda: "A tree-climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."

Panda Jokes? A panda go's into a bar order's a bowl of peanuts pulls out a gun shoot the bartender and walkes out Later a detective walkes in to investigate and got told the story so they get the panda and question him about the shooting so the panda say's "im not guilty look in a dictonary" so the detective gets a dictonary and looks up panda to which he see's "panda's eats shoots and leaves please star

Panda Joke? A panda walked into a bar, sat down and ordered a sandwich. After eating the sandwich he pulled out a gun and promptly shot a passing waiter dead. Then he got up and walked out of the bar. The panda returned the next day, and the bartender asked him why he killed the waiter. The panda replied "Look panda in the dictionary".The bartender does so, and reads: Panda-a large black-and-white herbivorous mammal of bamboo forest. Eats shoots and leaves."

A panda bear walks into a restaurant...? A panda bear walks into a restaurant and orders a sandwich. When he receives the sandwich he eats it and then shoots the waiter and leaves the restaurant. A policeman sees the panda and tells him he just broke the law. The panda bear tells the policeman that he's innocent and, if he didn't believe him, to look in the dictionary. The policeman gets a dictionary and looks up "panda bear." It says, ''Panda Bear: eats shoots and leaves.''

predictable panda joke... is it funny to you? A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for the food." The panda yells back, "Hey, man, I'm a panda. Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary to panda: "A tree-climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."

Senile Panda? A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for the food." The panda yells back, "Hey, man, I'm a panda. Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary to panda: "A tree-climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."

A stupid question about the "pygmy panda" discovery...? I'm not an expert on this stuff, only a person who reads National Geographic and Discover and watches zoos' panda cams. So if this sounds ignorant, please forgive me. The discovery of the giant panda's "pygmy panda" ancestor was in the news: http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20070618/sc_afp/usanimalschinapanda_070618210510 The scientists claim that the small panda skull they found proves the existence of a now-extinct pygmy panda ancestor. My question is, how do they know it was a small ancient adult panda and not a modern panda cub? What was different? I know panda cubs grow *really* fast, so I was thinking they'd have a lot of cartilage and their skulls would look different from adults'--would that be right, or am I off base? Just curious. I really wish pygmy pandas were still around, so I could have one as a pet! :-)

Panda joke? A panda walks into a cafe. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and fires two shots into the air. "Why?" asks the confused waiter, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder. The waiter turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds an explanation. "Panda.Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China.Eats, shoots and leaves." What does everyone think of it?I love this punctuation joke!Anyone know any other good jokes?Not the boring ones like why did the chicken cross the road. Mr Stick - the whole point is that the panda was following the bad definition in the book.Putting a comma in made it sound like he eats something, then shoots and then leaves instead of eating shoots and leaves.A joke doesn't have to tell you what's next.It had already reached the punch line!

Another dead panda...what do they know that we don't? Giant pandas do not breed in the wild. There hasn't been a documented case of natural pregnancy in a giant panda in over 25 years. Could it be that pandas understand something about natural selection that we bleeding heart humans are ignoring? They are all bred in captivity now, and the ones that are returned to the wild are dead within a year. So why are we helping them? Isn't it possible that pandas were supposed to be extinct decades ago to make evolutionary room for some other species that we will never know until we stop interfering? And I like pandas, so don't call me a hater. What I don't like is the hippie enviromentalists that think no species should go extinct, even when their survival is being forced in a lab.

Panda Panda? Does any one know any interesting panda facts? If you don't know what a panda looks like here is a picture http://unaesthetic.net/stuff/panda.jpg

Panda: Joke? A panda spent the night in bed with a prostitute the following morning as he is about ready to leave,The prostitute yells after him,"hey aren't you going to pay me?"The panda appears to look confused,so she throws the dictionary at him and tells him to look up prostitute,The definition reads:'A woman who engages in sexual activity for pay.The panda throws the dictonary back at the prostitute and tells her top look up 'panda'The definition reads;'A animal that eats bushes,shoots,and leaves.

my panda corys don't seem to be eating? i have a 5 gallon fish tank which was running for a couple weeks before i put in 3 dwarf gourami's and 5 panda corys, as well as a couple live plants. i put all of these things in the tank 3 days ago. the dwarf gourami's are really active and have been eating well, but for some reason my panda corys don't seem to be eating anything. i put in flakes for my gouramis (and some probably sinks to the bottom) but i also put in a couple Hikari sinking wafers. the corys don't seem to find them or care about them, though, and they just end up being eaten by the gourami's. i'm just afraid that the panda corys aren't getting enough food. any suggestions as to how i can make sure my pandas are getting food? or do they eat very little and i probably have nothing to worry about?

A panda walks in a bar......{chek it out}? A panda walks into a bar and orders a drink after he gets the drink, he shoots the waiter. The manager come in and says, "how could you shoot my waiter?" The panda says,"I'm a panda look it up in the dictionary." Manager geta a dictionary and sees - PANDA: A HERBIVOROUS MARSUPIAL. HE EATS SHOOTS AND LEAVES. SRRY ABT THE SPELLING MISTAKES. IT'S GETS AND NOT GETA.

Oh mysterious Panda of the Tundra, why couldn't you have chosen to manifest yourself as a seagull on a nice, temperate beach? First of all, you have created an impossibility, Pandas live in temperate bamboo forests in China, and you're telling me that you're a panda on a tundra???? Uh huh sure. Furthermore, I ain't following some mythical panda across a tundra. I did not rise to the top of the food chain through God's help to turn away from my central heat, and to turn away from seeking central heat for every family who need's it whether or not they have the money to pay for it. You hang on the tundra if you want to Panda. But you're only ensuring your own death and that of your followers! :--)

pandas cafe? panda bears cafe? the pandas cafe? does anyone know what im talking about its this childrens book. the tittle is somewhere along those lines. and its about this panda bear who owns a resturant and it becomes very busy and at the end a little mouse comes in and asks for a table for one and he says thiers no room left. and the mouse is sad then an elephant thinks of an idea. and makes his suitcase into a table for the mouse. and i know this is silly but its important does anyone know what book im talking about and the title of it?

pandas cafe? panda bears cafe? the pandas cafe? does anyone know what im talking about its this childrens book. the tittle is somewhere along those lines. and its about this panda bear who owns a resturant and it becomes very busy and at the end a little mouse comes in and asks for a table for one and he says thiers no room left. and the mouse is sad then an elephant thinks of an idea. and makes his suitcase into a table for the mouse. and i know this is silly but its important does anyone know what book im talking about and the title of it?

panda costume? Panda costume? i need a giant panda mask...only for my face but i dont want a plastic one i want an entire ...head. sort of like the easter bunnys wear in the mall...except a panda head. where can i find one...on line. i looked all over. post a link please :]

Panda costume? Panda costume? i need a giant panda mask...only for my face but i dont want a plastic one i want an entire ...head. sort of like the easter bunnys wear in the mall...except a panda head. where can i find one...on line. i looked all over. post a link please :]

Panda joke? A panda walks into a cafe. He orders some food and ate his lunch. After he ate his lunch, he gets a gun out and shoots everyone apart from a waitress. The waitress says:"Why did you do that for?" The panda says:"Try looking it up on the encyclopedia." and he left the cafe. The waitress goes to the library and gets the encyclopedia out and finds the page where she read: Pandas: Eats shoots and leaves.

anecdote or story about a panda and a rifle? sweet jesuli, famous spanish footballer who believed in an afterlife. Unfortunately for him when he went to a ZOO he was shot by a man dressed in a panda suit. Later, reports suggest the aggressor had used an assault rifle to shoot Jesuli. BUt the weapon was never found. This was because the panda suit guy hid the rifle in the Panda's nest. Later, after the shooting of jesuli. Two pandas found a rifle in one of the glorious, springy,scrumptious bushes. Unfortunately the PAnda's did'nt know how to use it and shot each other. they died ! However later on that day the local janitor who cleans the nest's, saw there were 2 dead panda's on the ground and. Then just walked away as if nothing had happened. don't take this too seriously. I was only makin fun!

Does Panda corporate antivirus perform as well as Symantec? A customer of mine needs corporate antivirus on their network. We always use Symantec corporate. They have a recomendation from another vendor to use Panda instead. the cost is about $800 with Symantec, $500 for the Panda. Is it worth taking a chance on Panda for that sort of savings?

about panda antivirus? hi, anyone can help me with more info about Panda? I have been working with free AVG on my laptop, and, considering my laptop is not too fast, I have been afraid of using Panda, because i used it once on my PC and it became really slow... now, besides the advantage that AVG is free, can you tell me if it's reliable enough if I am conected to the Internet all day, or, should I change to Panda instead? Thanks! plus, I have noticed that my laptop became slower than it was, so I am thinking maybe is because of some virus?

Pregnant panda? With the recently impregnated panda in the zoo now, shouldn't we be educating our young pandas about abstinence, birth control, condoms, and STDs? I think this will soon become a world wide epidemic. Maybe we should host a live aide...for pandas.

A panda joke that's right a panda? A panda gets released from prison and the first thing he does is go find a hooker he takes her to a nice restaurnt and orders his food and they both eat he then takes her back to a hotel and fu#ks her he then gets up and leaves the hooker quite angry say hey ypur supposed to pay me he says look up panda in the dictionary Eats Shoots Leaves

ZoneAlarm , Panda & utorrent? I have blocked utorrent in my firewall "ZONEALARM" as a mistake. Now I think that it must be unblocked for downloading movies via utorrent. Am I correct? If 'yes', through what I should do it? Through antivirus-(PANDA) or firewall-(ZoneAlarm)? then what is the proceedure to unblock what I'v blocked in zonealarm (or PANDA)?. please explain simply coz I'm very new to both utorrent, zonealarm & PANDA.

Help ... Panda problem? IF I HAVE 2 PANDAS , HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE TO CREATE A BABY PANDA ? I AM TRYING TO SOLVE THE PANDA SHORTAGE . ANY HELP WOUL BE APPRECIATED. Funny you ask about the bamboo. I've had boy bamboo and girl bamboo in the same room for months....still no baby bamboo.

Help with Panda Antivirus 2007!? How do I completely uninstall Panda Antivirus 2007 from my system? When I try to uninstall it,it keeps saying "A previous uninstallation operation(without restart) has been detected.To install Panda Antivirus 2007 correctly,you must first restart your computer.Then install Panda 2007 again." I have restarted a couple of times and I still get this message. HELP!!!

Why are Panda Bears still around? Darwin says "no."? For some time now I've been looking upon Panda bears with some amazement. They've been an endangered species for a really long time but still they are here. Well, a few of them anyway. These creatures seem to be on earth just to make fun of us and science. Why are these bears still here? Some time, way back, they've decided to stop eating meat and start eating bamboo instead. Any bamboo? No just the young parts of certain bamboo subspecies. In order to get enough out of these plants they have to eat these things for hours and hours per day, otherwise they would starve. This keeps the Panda so busy that they don't have enough time to do anything else and it's still not enough food to make them do more than just wander around a bit. They hardly ever have sex, they hardly reproduce and yet, they are still amongst us. When in captivity these creatures are really picky and refuse to reproduce at all! The fact that there are still Panda bears can in no way be explained by the Theory qncy- man can only do so much. as I have previously noted, pandas usually never reproduce in a non-natural environment

Could a panda bite my arm off? Pandas are part of the same family as Grizzli bears and Polar bears, both of which are very dangerous and deadly...If I accidentally leaned over the Panda cage at the zoo, would the Panda be strong enough to bite it off?

panda bear hamsters???? i was just at the pet store and i saw a cute brown and white babie panda bear hamstet and it was a adorable.!!!r they really loveing and sweet?cause it look adorable and do they grow big cause i dont want something tiny!!tell me all u no bou t panda bear hamsters please!!! and can they get along with another kind of hamster or it's own

Panda Express/Tiananmen Square jr.? Hi. I had Panda Express yesterday (super meal, three entrees, chow mein and an egg roll) and I just ran, or should I say waddled, to the bathroom and experienced something that would make Katrina victims blush. Can anyone tell me if this was from the Panda Express? If so, they should start advertising their meals as Natural Colonics

Panda Joke? A baby panda goes into IKEA to get some furnature, the salesman asks "well, what's your place like now?" The baby panda replies "It's a little bare."

Panda Cells? How many cells make up a panda? What type of cells are they? How do they work together to form the panda?

panda and casper! anyone?!? my gf's birthday is coming up soon.. i got her those earing she once stopped next to in the market at the jewelry store.. so the thing is am thinking of putting it in a Gift can.. (she likes these things) and printing all around tht can Panda chasing Casper.. so i asked around! and no one could help me find such a drawing! could any of you help me out in finding any type of cartoon drawing or wthever.. where a Panda is running after Casper (the ghost) ! i would very much appreciate it..

panda eyes? why is it, by the end of the day if i've had dark-ish make-up on i ALWAYS look like a panda thats been punched?!?! lol, if i rubbed my eyes i'd understand, or indead if i was a panda who'd been punched. why does this happen n how can i stop it? sorry i meant eye-shadow and eye liner. and why the hell are there so many morons out tonight? jeez...if ur not guno help or giv a SENSIBLE answer dnt bother at all!

Panda Bear Question....??? Does anything eat Panda Bears....(Giant Panda's)?... if soo what eats it.....???... :)

panda anti-virus enquiry? i have a copy of panda platinum anti-virus 2005 which i got with my computer in the software bundle i have only decided to use it now so i have a few questions i would like answered 1.as it is a year old(but unused),will there be any problems with registration,because it is a 2005 edition 2.as it has a firewall on it,do i have to disable my one in sp2,or can i run both 3.will the spyware apts conflict with any of my existing programs(spybot,adaware-se) 4.i have 12 months free services with the disc,will they start from the day i install it? i also have a copy of norton anti-virus that came with the motherboard chipset drivers disc,so can i put this on my second machine when my existing subscription runs out anyone used panda before,i would be glad of any feedback thank you

Panda joke! hope you like it~? Ok you might of heard this one already but... There is a panda who walks into a bar. He sits down in a seat and orders a hamburger. He eats it, then he stands up and the bartender said "Hey, you havent paid me!", then he takes out a gun, and shoots the bartender. Then he walks out the door. A man in the seat near him saw the whole thing. He pulled out a dictionary and looked up the word panda. "Eats shoots and leaves."